The most annoying office jargon phrases revealed
If being told to “think outside the box” makes you want to punch someone you’re not alone- a new survey has awarded it the crown of the most hated office buzz phrase.
The survey by Opinium research found that the use of office jargon or management-speak is the fourth-biggest office annoyance after grumpy or moody colleagues, slow computers and small talk/gossip in the office.
Although it was a British survey most of the top 10 annoying phrases will be familiar to New Zealand corporate workers.
These include “Let’s touch base,” which was runner-up in the poll, “Push the envelope”, which came eighth and “Get all your ducks in a row” (tenth).
More unusual jargon included “blamestorming”, which is similar to brainstorming except you’re working out who to blame for something, and “Let’s not throw pies in the dark”, which means a plan is needed.
The most annoying jargon-
1. Thinking outside the box
2. Let's touch base
3. Blue sky thinking
4. Blamestorming
5. Drill down to a more granular level
6. Let's not throw pies in the dark
7. I've got that on my radar
8. Push the envelope
9. Bring your A-game
10. Get all your ducks in a row
Private Bin invites NBR readers to make their own suggestions on the most annoying office jargon/management speak.
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Comments and questions40
These expressions are great! Has any ever played "Office Lingo-Bingo"?
Here is a link - it makes office meetings much more fun and people actually have a reason to stay awake. Dilbert would love the game!
http://www.potfire.com.au/entertain/wwbingo.htm
Take a helicopter view
Low hanging fruit
If you're up to your arse in alligators, tomorrow is the first day of the rest of your life.
"Subscriber Only Content"
What? Me worry?
"... by close of play"
Going forward.
Any use of the word "utilise" and its variants when using the word "use" would do. (It takes a bit of getting utilised to, but it's worth the effort to CUT IT OUT!)
any kind of "space" with reference to a sector
I'll KIV that (keep in view)
I use 'ducks in a row' all the time! It reminds me of my Nana, who actually had ducks in a row on the wall of her lounge. I thought it was a cute kiwiana phrase. I'll stop then.
annoying jargon?
why is this annoying?
thinking outside the box = be creative.
lets touch base = lets catch up.
going forward = everything we do from this point onwards should be influenced by what we've just learned (how this would be a bad thing i don't know...)
bring your a-game = do your best.
get all your ducks in a row = make sure everythings in order.
i've got that on my radar = its on my to-do list.
push the envelope = innovate.
lists like this are BIG MEDIAs way of pandering to the little guy and scoring brownie points in the perceived battle against 'the man'.
which is odd because BIG MEDIA, well, they ARE 'the man' or at least so closely related they share a lot of DNA.
It's annoying because it's overused and people say these phrases to make them sound half way knowledgeable in what they are talking about.
win-win situation > there can only be one winner or consensus (and than nobody wins).
management by wandering around > not having a clue what you are doing.
Can i have that immediately if not sooner
How's about the elephant in the living room?
I've still to see my first one! - or is that one already?
Take it offline.
Dovetail
A quick and dirty assessment
Let's not try to boil the ocean
Be proactive, not reactive (in case anyone does not know what the opposite of proactive is)
BHAGs
Moving forward HAS to go!
challenges instead of problems?
Organic/Inorganic Growth - stuff you do in the garden
Best in Breed - stuff they do at Karaka
Cross Pollination - stuff Bees do
State of the Art - Picasso
Value Add - Chinese Abacus
Stakeholder - something you do with Tomatoes
I had a boss who used this phrase incessantly. He didn't even stop when I started leaping in every time to say "... it's night time". Such a plonker (this was in the UK - 'nuff said).
lol
thought leadership
over arching
by COB (close of business)
we need you to give 150%
At the end of the day, Annoying?, the simple fact is I'm passionate about not interacting with you in the work space.
I couldn't agree more with these! So funny. So Cringeworthy. ugh... and I will also add 'have a quick brainstorm'.
"Ticks all the boxes"
YOu are boring cow
- it's all good
- apologising for "any" inconvenience - what about "all and every" inconvenience for once?
- it's a line-call
- the maximising/ation of anything
passionate (in reference to photo-copying or whatever)
extreme(ly)
major
excited (in reference to things that are simply not really exciting = see above)
An old one ....'at the end of the day' has now become 'at the end of the end of the day ' and a new one that I am already over .. "its not a good look '.
I think 'Lets ramp it up' is pretty annoying and abreviations for everything really do my head in!
Perhaps just focus on delivery and then the words people use won't bother you so much - clearly too much time on their hands to gripe and complain!
BHAGs --- ooooooh a Vodafoner!
Its not a problem, its an opportunity.
a classic of the genre
How many times in a day do we hear people say "in terms of". What does it mean? What value does it add?
Corporate DNA of course - that's how we know we're key valued team players!
most annoying office jargon for used by my female boss:
going off in a tangent
no way hosea
whatever
you're not listening
can she more specific that that??
What's annoying??? Because it's jargon. You just translated all of those phrases so why don't people just say what they mean instead of using the lingo, duuuhhh. Remember when you were in university? What did the prof tell you about writing an essay? No jargon. No cliches. Just write what you mean. But now we're out in the "real world" that's what it's all about! No wonder people are so screwed up. Annoying.
Did someone mention this one "make sure we cross our t's and dot our i's". Ugh. I hate jargon. It's people's way of making themselves sound more intelligent than they really are. The real intelligent people use plain language and say what they mean and can talk to all classes of people - the academics or those who didn't finish school. That is the truth.
in my office, we always hear "it is what it is." um...ok.
My boss and her sidekick speak the same management speak and it scares me! Ridiculous. Here are a few examples that I (unfortunately) have to hear often:
We've got a lot coming down the pipeline
I'll keep you in the loop
Can we push back that meeting to X time? (Can't they just say postpone til or something? "Push back" gets on my nerves!)
Going forward
The word "certainly" every 3rd sentence
Flip me that e-mail (just say "send" for G-d's sake!!)
Lunch 'n learn! (Ugh so cheesy to me haha)
Let's downplay it (when boss has to tell someone bad news but doesn't want them to freak out so she spins it a certain way)
Why was this "overlooked" (instead of saying "not done" lol)
There are a ton more but these must be the ones that annoy me the most! I don't think I'm cut out for the corporate life...!
irrigardless .... is that even a word???? annoys the crap out of me!!!
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